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CARLA TARTARE

Juicy, well-seasoned, good with fries.

 - Michael Ruhlman – Slate.com, 19 May 2011.

Food and sex really are in the same category after all. From the limbic centers they light up in our brains – those deep, primordial bits of us – to the satisfying sense of sharing something good, cooking together and getting it on might just give you more than a glow of good health.

Weather-appropriate squash soup with rye croutons

In preparation for the upcoming VVW 25th anniversary extravaganza, Dad and I headed out to Heirloom Café for dinner and, perhaps, some California-style inspiration.

Heirloom Café opened in mid-May and is a whopping six blocks from my apartment, but, of course, I hadn’t been. (To be fair, one could dine within a three block radius of 23rd and Guerrero and eat for a solid month without repetition. And I owe Beretta my late-night Saturday soul.) It’s also garnered a fair amount of acclaim and a healthy dose of sf-style-under-the-radar buzz.

The decor is simple; the food is simple; the idea is, well, simple. Homey food, done clean and right, with a clear eye toward hooking a wine geek crowd: not only is all the food wine-friendly, but corkage drops over 50% if your bottle is more than 10 years old.

This is the kind of restaurant a former somm opens – and it works.

At the end of a cozy line of two-tops, Dad and I dipped into a perfectly balanced squash soup – “It’s the perfect day for a squash soup,” murmured our server and, though his Parisian affect missed the mark, the soup was indeed spot-on – and a gigantic crostini of feta, roasted fennel, cucumber, and heirloom tomatoes. The portions were, in true home style, gargantuan – you could easily order apps and call it a night – but we followed up with a smooth chicken breast over quinoa, brussel sprouts, and bacon and coffee-braised lamb served over a gratin of celery root and topped with a bright walnut gremolata. The chicken was crying for salt – or acid – or spice – or really anything to differentiate it from the cheesy quinoa, but the lamb was deelish. Not exciting, not superb, but excellent eat-out food. As Dad said, the kind of place you come once a quarter, try the new menu, see the new crowd. Five months old and it’s already a stand-by. Not too shabby.

Ginger-molasses cookie. Pardon the poor image. Just know, this cookie is: Huge. Not a gourmet cookie. A real cookie. The perfect meal-ending cookie.

Of course, the most impressive course – as befits a homey joint – was dessert. Both the caramel-drizzled molasses cookie, served warm and gooey, almost as though it had been steamed hot, and the ultimate sf-foodie combo of the Straus-Ritual affogato, were satisfying without overwhelming, leaving you with that perfect just-about-full feeling.

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…tailed  curled between my legs.

So, it’s been a while. Hello, again, world.

Had coffee last Friday with a fellow foodie friend and a lovely superman-style woman: Intuit employee by day, food media consultant by night. Rawther intriguing, truth be told. I was simply tagging along, but was graciously invited into the chat and – hey! – it turns out I talk like a food-lover and, slightly more disconcertingly, a food-blogger. So here we go: walking the walk.

This blog aims to be a little bit of this, a little bit of that, with a nod to my Jewish mama’s family (hey, Tevye) and a healthy dose of my Franco-Italo-Algerian grandfather’s influence. I’m a mutt, so too must be my blog. Check in for recipes, restaurant reviews, and, from time to time when my procrastinating juices really get flowing, a New Yorker style essay or two. Basically, I like food, I like writing – let’s see if I can multitask. And if you like food and you like reading, hey, check in from time to time.

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Ritual might be the hipster scene, but Phil’z is where you go if you want truly tasty coffee. Individually double filtered – handmade as they tout – and doctored to your specifications (“real sweet, medium sweet, not too sweet?”), each cup is smooth and rich in layered flavor. The only place in San Francisco where you can really taste coffee as you would wine. The baristi working the paper filters seem genuinely happy, to boot. Head in by yourself and you’ll get more sweeties and darlin’s than you knew would think possible north of the Mason-Dixon. If you’re there on a Saturday morning, the man himself might be on hand to take your order.

Phil’z Coffee

3101 24th St. at Folsom St. map
San Francisco, CA 94110

Recommended: Aromatic Arabic, Phil’s “Mocha” Tesora, Ether.

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Oh, Ritual. How I love you. Your hipstery goodness. Your Sunday morning people watching (babies galore!). Your thick chocolatey brews. Your bowling ball o’ chai. Your adult men coloring. With Crayola 64 packs, in coloring books. On a Monday night. Your common table in the window, built for eavesdropping, spying for acquaintances, and making eyes at strangers all at once. Your just-right dose of vaguely Soviet propaganda. Oh, Ritual – how I love you.

Ritual Roasters

1026 Valencia Street
San Francisco, CA 94110

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Roadrunners at Luna Park

Roadrunners.     Bloody Mary of 2009.

The elusive, fleet-footed bird can be found at Luna Park Kitchen & Cocktails (Valencia @ 18th). With notes of sage, chili pepper, and slyly sweet cactus fruit, the ‘runner is bright and easy to drink – vivacity in a glass. I could sip one all day.

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To preface, a nota bene: I dislike every show Rachel Ray is on. I believe she has a sense for strong, simple flavor and is surely a great cook. But, bless her heart, is she bubbly. Bubbly like cheap champagne, like the Andre’s your college roommate brings home and forces you to toast the end of the quarter with, the bubbles popping like grapefruit flavored napalm in your throat. Hard to swallow, impossible to crave.

But, despite my involuntary cringe at the mention of EVOO (please, Rachel, just say oil, or spice it up with a nice long evvoooooo), I am appalled and, even more so, saddened by the news that Ray is on a diet.

I applaud the fact that this might mean that more healthy recipes get put on the air. The quality of food in-take, even by those who espouse a healthy living style, is ridiculously poor. But food is about enjoying. And if her phosphorescent personality is any clue, people aren’t watching Rachel Ray for health tips. They want fun. And, lord help me, EVOO.

Jim Harrison can write a damn fine sentence. His prose grips you in its hard beauty and makes you ache in the spot just behind and below your stomach, that unreachable, unsoothable spot where your soul must live. His characters engender disgust, pity, and jealous love so strong you want not only to possess them, but to be them. The crush of empathy will make you double over.

Fortunately, the man also knows a thing or two about feeding the gastric guardian standing watch over our fragile and aching souls.

It’s simple, he said. Eat or die.

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